There was a suitcase, takeout boxes, liquor, beer cans, wine glasses, and clothes strew upon the floor. The photos of Socio and me that were on his shelves and fridge had been replaced by photos of him and ANOTHER woman, a young looking one, no more than 20 years old. There were photos of them taken at the same places we had been, including Mexico.....it was like walking into your own episode of Dateline Special Victims Unit.
I rounded the corner to the bedroom and sure enough Socio and his other girlfriend were laying naked under the covers. My heart was pounding. I shook Socio awake and if I could bottle his face, I would have...."OH SHIT."
Now, I am not at all proud to share what happened next..., but there is no holding back here....
The rage in me was so strong, so intense, so unpredicted, I snapped. All of my hate, my anguish, my fears, they all came spilling out. I ripped the covers off the 2 of them and started a tornado of destruction. I broke photos, I broke glasses, I broke framed posters. I ripped clothes out of the closet, I threw plates on the ground like bouncy balls.
I ran to the bathroom and locked myself inside with her purse. I rummaged threw it. She went to college in the Midwest, a good school actually, and she was only 18, OMG! (I later learned they started sleeping together when she was 16, him 35, they met at work, she was a summer intern)......I started to gag and thought I was going to vomit. I splashed cold water on my face and sobbed. I looked in the mirror and remember thinking "You did this to yourself you fool. You knew this was a disaster. You stayed." I then shoved her purse into the toilet, it was all I could think to do because he was pounding at the door and about to break it down, I didn't want to get caught with it.
I shut the toilet lid and opened up the door suddenly. I grabbed his balls so hard that he fell to the ground in a heap. She stood there behind him speechless.....not doing or saying anything, wearing only his t-shirt, her hairless crotch hanging out of the bottom of the hem, which only made her look younger and more helpless... her mouth was gaped open, jaw unhinged....we were both connecting the dots.
As I waited for the elevator. He came charging out of his apartment. I instinctively protected my neck, I remember thinking, protect your neck, he could snap it. He lunged at me and pulled my hair and threw an entire heavy garbage bag of my belongings at my head. I reason he packed my stuff that were at his apartment whenever she came into town. He screamed "WE ARE DONE!"
I walked out of his building with streams of thick tears running down my face. My head was killing me from where he pulled my hair. I was clutching my garbage bag full of possessions and did the only thing I knew to do....
I called his mother and told her the entire story.
She cried. I cried. She told me about the lies , ALL of the lies. She told me, "I wanted to tell you, but I wanted you to save him, I am so sorry I did this to you." I knew this was the best revenge I could get on him, making sure his family knew the truth. No one else mattered, they were the only ones that really knew how messed up he really was and he was using me to look better to them, so they were the jury on this one.
A few months ago, right before I met Crush, I was getting my nails done and a women kept staring at me. I was looking at her, too, she seemed familiar, I tried to place her. While we were drying, she asked me, "I think you dated my brother "The Sociopath" like forever ago?"
I nodded. She then continued to tell me that he was doing super great, got married, had just had a new baby. I then instantly recalled, she was the sister I always liked the least, the one that was very caught up in the machine of appearances, the only sibling younger than him, she was about 6 years older than me and away in grad school when I had dated the Sociopath, I had only met her once before.
I felt the tears welling up inside of me and I couldn't contain them. I couldn't hold them back. I started to cry. She thought I was crying because I still loved him and she said, "don't worry, you will find someone too, you are very pretty."
And then told her....."I am not crying because I miss him, I crying because I feel so bad for the woman who married him and for his son. Your brother is a monster and a sociopath. You know it, I would be embarrassed if that was my brother, too."
I then got up, grabbed my purse, and smudged 8 out of my 10 nails.