Binge Free: Week 2 Recap

It was another good week around here.  I worked all weekend, so my eating is always a bit sporadic when I am working nonstop (my job requires me to sometimes be pretty much up and on for about 72 hours straight....and no, I am not a lady of the night).  Then, as per usual, I eat lots and sleep lots when the work is done and it all seems to balance out as it has according to the scale this morning.

I did eat a bunch of cookies and crackers last night while I was trying to sleep.  Not really a binge as I was COMPLETELY aware of the crumbs in the bed and why I was doing it.  I was also super hungry because I hadn't been able to eat anything all day.....butterflies!

I will be seeing le Crush in 1 week and I am NERVOUS!  I am really mostly excited, but I am nervous too because well, I find him to be very attractive.  Conventionally, I am not sure if everyone would think so, but I am really into his inside AND outside and oy........I hate to admit this, but I have NEVER been attracted, like really attracted to anyone I have ever dated.  I had to get drunk the first few months of the relationship with Awful to sleep with him for the most part.  DID I JUST ADMIT THAT?!  I did.  OMG, I did.  So, now that I like what I see with Crush and I LOVE who he is as a person, well, I do think I am going to be just a little pile of mush and I do hope I can remain ladylike even though I am waging that I may not be able to....we will see.

I am working on packing for our little trip and all I have come up with is underwear, it is really not a good sign here as I am sure I will be required to wear pants at some time during this trip...

Binge Free: Day 5 (Week 2)

Another really good day yesterday.  1,700 calories.  I am starting to really get the eating to satisfaction thing here....I mean, hunger has never been the issue for me.  My feelings have been.

As of late, I am feeling like things will be okay.  Even if it doesn't work out with Crush, at least now I know that normal guys exist, though they may live in different cities...they are around. You just have to look a bit for them.

Someone asked me, what will you do if this doesn't work out with Crush? Yes, I will be sad, but I will be okay, too.  Awful was the big let down for me because he promised me things from the very beginning and then he couldn't make right by his statements.

Crush and I have openly discussed not making any promises to each other yet that we can't keep.  Therefore, I can dream, but I am not going to get caught up in some fantasy of maybes and some days without a reason and he is already beginning to give me some very good reasons, all the coincidences aside...Crush is a man of his word and I am going to wait to see what the future may hold. It is fun to wander into my thoughts, but I am really pulling myself back each and every day, so I do not let my heart get too attached to something so much more than what I am experiencing now.  Because I am staying in reality, I am not turning to food.  I am not feeling let down by a situation I created in my mind.

I lived and learned from my experience with Awful.  Actions speak louder than words. 

Binge Free: Days 2-4 (Week 2)

Oddly enough....I have been doing really well with the binging.  Much of this is because I am really avoiding many of the foods that cause epic binges for me: crackers, cereal, string cheese...!

I also feel really excited and all full of butterflies because of Crush, it is hard for me to swallow when I am smiling.

Calories for the past few days have been right around 1,400.  Weight is the same, but I had a major wardrobe achievement which I will share in a post in just a moment.

I do think that I will record my calories every day in a post (I am using a calorie counter, highly recommend!), put only post Binge Free once a week as I bet it is a bit tedious and all.  One post will have all 7 days starting on week 3 which is coming up. I am also interested to see how a week looks calorie wise in total, so this may help....

Binge Free: Day 1 (Week 2)

1,200 calories....not hungry at all yesterday.  A bit more hungry today.  Excited about the potential of a second week binge free!