I have always believed that signs come in 3's.
I have received 2 signs thus far and I am not looking forward to the third.
But, I am preparing myself mentality for the possibility......
This weekend, I attended a charity event with my mom for a wonderful organization that a dear vendor friend of mine sits on the board for. As we were collecting our place cards, I saw Awful's name on an uncollected place card and my heart starting beating a mile a minute...."Mooooommmmm......look, SHIT!!!! What if we see him?????? OH NO!!!! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Mom, do you think it is him?????"
She reassured me that Awful has a super common name and not to get all worried. If we saw him, we would be kind ladies. We would avoid mentioning anything personal like Crush or my move because we don't want bad energy and we would stay super positive and warm.
In all fairness, Awful is charitable and gets involved in many causes, so the chance of seeing him there was not at all impossible.
Phew, we NEVER saw him. Must have been a different one, he was too hungover to make it (great possibility), or we didn't spot him as there were 500 people in attendance and his height (he isn't vertically gifted) makes him harder to spot than most.
THEN, yesterday, I was catching up on the Sunday NY Times and there was his name AGAIN! This time as a part of a pair in the weddings section. As my eyes traveled to the photo, I prayed that it was indeed him and he was married, so the past could really truly be in the past. The chances of him being married aren't totally off. He proposed to his first wife 7 months after meeting her and they were married soon there after and then divorced less than a year after that. He is impulsive with everything is his life, BUT ME (THANK GOODNESS!!!!).
We also do have mutual friends in common who I believe he still sees, so if he ever did ask about me, there is a possibility that they could have told him I was dating someone seriously and moving. The reality is that Awful is one of the most competitive people I know. He needs to win. He needs to be richer, smarter, and funnier than anyone else, since he can't be taller, handsomer, or nicer.....Remember, this is a man who slept with someone 6 days after we officially broke up and perhaps cheated on me more than once (verdict still out on this, BUT I know, regardless of what happened, he spent time inappropriately with women while I was not present during our relationship)....quality person he isn't.
But....it wasn't him. It was just another man with Awful's name.
Still......what are the chances????
You see, it was almost 1 year ago when I saw the clairvoyant who predicted Crush and the promise of a better life. She wrote out Awful's exact name letter for letter and told me to stay away forever, to never look back. I haven't spoken to Crush for a year next month, I haven't emailed with him for almost 10 months, and I haven't seen him for 15 months and counting.
Since I am out of here FOREVER (WHOOT!) in 4 months and counting, I do believe that a chance meeting with Awful could be on the horizon....AWFUL possible news....bleck!
The universe is trying to tell me something....I can FEEL it. Let's just hope that this is just a couple of coincidences.....I already hide out as best as I can, so I don't have to see him.....but, I cannot control everything!!!
I know how bad the feeling of running into an ex could be, but you are in a better position than him since, um, ALWAYS! He should be afraid to run into you, since your life is moving on up and looking forward.
ReplyDeleteThat is so sweet! It is just my own anxiety and the fact that I have been honestly avoiding people and places just to not have to see him! It will all be okay if I do, he won't be afraid, he is a smug turkey like that!
DeleteI think that you are being reminded of how awful "Awful" was to make you appreciate how wonderful Crush is!!
ReplyDeleteYou are so sweet and I hope so! If I can get out of here without seeing Awful....I will consider myself even luckier than I already am!
DeleteI agree with Danielle, you have everything going for you - there is nothing to be afraid of. Everything is falling into place for you. Embrace it - and if, G-d Forbid, he does appear, then own it! xo
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! I will own it, but I hope I won't have to....if I do see him, I know it will be okay, I would just rather not of course....
DeleteYou know, even if you run into him. Sometimes we need to face our fears to take power away from them. You are giving him a lot of power right now....so, if the universe sends him your way, you will be ok, you will make it through it even if it sucks and then that fear will be gone forever.
ReplyDeleteYou are right. This is wonderful insight and you made me feel a ton better. If I do have to see him, then I can get over that fear of seeing him!
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