The
trip was a total success. Better than I
imagined. I am floating on a
cloud…….and…..in a very traditional Southern turn of events, I have been
somewhat lavaliered. Yes, lavaliered….
Not
is the Greek system sense as it doesn’t have any fraternity ties, but, Crush
gave me his prep school class ring today after lunch with a grand speech about
how it is traditional to give a class ring from his particular school before an
engagement ring and he wants me to know that he is starting the process. He chose to tell me this in the midst of a 3 mile walk around town in the middle of the day when it was 92 degrees and 100 percent humidity. I was also wearing jeans and needing a cold
drink badly and we were on our way to get 1 for me. I was so confused as to what was exactly going
on (was he about to propose!?) that I nearly fainted!
Not
yet, but we are getting closer. Almost
to Phase 2 we are…..he told me that I should wear the ring on my left hand ring
finger to “warm it up” for the next couple months. Swoon.
Also,
I have huge fingers for a lady and he mentioned that he can’t wear the class
ring on any of his fingers anymore (he was a LATE bloomer and grew about 8
inches during college), but it fits my left hand ring finger perfectly. Again, I am not at all surprised because
things with us always seem to be this way, but still…what are the chances?
Crush
told me he will be coming back out to the Midwest 1 more time to “talk to my
Daddy” this summer and that his Momma and he are beginning to work on picking
out my ring……In an odd turn of events, my Mom’s ring and his Momma's are exactly
the same setting, just with a different shaped diamond! Crush's Momma has
phenomenal taste and I admire her fashion sense, poise, and kindness. I am VERY happy that she will be involved in
the process. I think it is super sweet and a huge compliment that she wants to help him with the ring.
I
am NOT just excited about a ring (which I am), but to spend my life in a place
I LOVE with a man I LOVE. I truly
believe that Crush is the ONLY man for me and this trip out gave me tons of
confidence that my future will be bright.
Better than I ever dreamed. I
can’t wait to be the lady I have always been in my heart. To emerge from my cocoon.
So….the
parents meeting….well….it was JUST PERFECT!!! Everyone got on like a house on
fire and the folks just clicked. The
weekend went by in a flash! 2 suppers
with his folks, 1 show with his folks, 1 concert with his folks, 1 lunch with
his lovely Grandmomma, 1 trip to the beach, 1 trip to Crush’s home town and
many many many sites in between….sunsets, singing, fried chicken, white wine, champagne toasts, and ice cream cones. HEAVEN. I also worked out everyday I was there which is a huge accomplishment in itself....I just feel SO good in the South! Everything is easier for me.
My
folks just like me, felt right at home.
There is simply nothing like Southern hospitality. Common courtesy, patience, social grace and manners,
and best of all, everyone is super friendly!
I
am sorry to say, but my current city is just missing it all…..and it may just be
me, but I personally feel that here, I lose a little
faith in humanity day by day. The mean
girls. The backstabbing. The crime.
The violence. The racial
tension. The road rage. The political corruption.
And
I know that in my future state, things are not perfect. Perfection doesn’t exist, but the simple
acknowledgement of life does. Pregnant
ladies (all ladies as a matter of fact!) are offered seats, doors are held
open, people who know each other…even just a little bit, actually stop to say
“hello” and do not pretend to not see one each other (I am guilty of this in my
city as I feel like it is just the way to conduct myself socially), store
clerks and servers smile, exchange pleasantries, and make eye contact. It is so refreshing. I hope it never changes. I LOVE IT!
It
makes me feel like I have purpose, the friendliness….that the world cares about the people in
it. I feel at peace and it brings out
the best in me. I smile and wave and
chat and hug and compliment and walk with my head held high. I stand up straight and make healthy choices
for my mind and body.
When
I am down South, my anxiety is minimal, my confidence is sky-high, and my need
to binge eat is non-existent. It is such
a huge indication of how environment is a major trigger for me. If I do not like where I am, it is hard for
me to be myself. It is shocking that my
location has such a great influence on my feeling of self-worth. But at 32 years old, I still have so much
life left ahead of me (let's hope!!!). I know when I move, I
will not only let go of the past things that have hurt me, I will celebrate how
far I have come in order to get to a peaceful place for me.
Just
like how I sent my “Husband List” out to sea last June to my
grandfather, I plan to send a letter out to the universe to all of the people that have hurt me
in September when I move. I plan to list
why they hurt me, what I could have done better, and what I have learned. I will send it out at my happiest
place on Earth (Crush’s beach house) and then it will all be in the past and given to the powers above, if
you will. I do believe that forgiveness
is necessary for progress and I want to be the best and brightest I can be for
me.
This
weekend I learned more about Crush’s past, present, and future. His family is so utterly fascinating. Trend-setters. Barrier breakers. Entrepreneurs. Charitable beyond comprehension. I know why he kept so much a secret. I would have, too…..I understand it all
now. History. I am encouraging him to write a book. He has a story to tell. He is truly one of a
kind and a product of his environment. I
say this now as only a compliment.
The
future holds so much good. The present is
being wrapped up now. I love and care
for my clients dearly and I will DO WHATEVER I CAN to make everything the
absolute best it can be.
I
want to leave on a high note, especially since I have heard terrible rumors and
lies about me. It is time to prove
myself to myself….my final swan song in a place I cannot wait to not call
home.
The
past will finally be in the past and my future is so clear and near, I can taste it.
Live life now, but dream big.
"Live life now, but dream big" is a great quote! Something to remember everyday I think. I'm glad that they got along so well! I figured they would, as they all just want what's best for their children! So happy for you!
ReplyDeleteRemember, forgiveness is for you, write it down, be done with it all, and move on. I think this plan is great for you to let go of your past and forgive yourself for anything you have been keeping in.
R&F...I could not be happier for you! What an incredible weekend. So glad the parents meeting went smoothly. Sounds like you come from a family very similar to each other. Your parents love and care for you and each other. What an incredibly exciting time in your life. So glad you are recording it in a blog so you can always look back at this incredibly exciting time in your life.
ReplyDeleteDon't worry too much about rumours. Like I always said during my divorce when my wasband was being a dick: You cannot control what other people say about you. You can only trust that the people who truly know you, know the truth :)
ReplyDeleteWhat is stopping you from being the lady you always wanted to be in your heart now as opposed to when you move?