Monday, January 13, 2014

Shit Happens (In My Pants!)

DISCLAIMER: This post may gross you out!

It's times like these that I am glad that I am still veiled under anonymity.  If not, how could I share with  you this little gem...?

I pooped my pants this weekend.  For the first time since I was 3.  Does this give me street cred?

My personal mortification about this is suffocating me.  I am coming clean and no one has to read any further if I am making you gag.

Late Friday night, I started feeling awful.  Feverish, achy, tummy pains, just terrible.

I was rolling all over the bed, so I decided to get up and sleep on my couch and let Crush rest in the bed.  I had tons of Bravo shows to catch up on to distract me from my symptoms.

Well, after a night of restless couch sleep peppered with the sounds of Reza, Nene, Pascale and Lisa, I woke up mid-morning, covered in sweat.  Stiff, crampy and alone.  I guess in the midst of my zonked out state, Crush left to catch up on work.  I was taking an inventory of my condition when I felt a stomach pain like no other wash over me.  It doubled me over.  I got up as soon as my feverish self allowed me so I could get to the restroom ASAP,  but it was too late.  Very Charlotte-like in Sex and The City (the movie).    If the ladies of SATC poop in their trousers, everyone must, right?! It's quite fashionable and fabulous so I have heard.

If anyone out there has ever thought (I am sure none of you have), wow, Ready and Fading is cool.  Well, please consider that I poop my pants sometimes, too.

1 comment:

  1. As a blogger, I find that there are times (a lot of them) that I have to write about things just to get over 'em and let them go. Meaning: as soon as I poop my pants you'll know about it, too. I hope you're feeling better!


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