Forbidden Foods

I am getting real with myself and my food addiction.

It sucks.

It has made me SUPER emotional and that is a good thing.  I need to get to the root of my issues.

Food has always been a coping mechanism for me.  I use it as a drug.  To escape reality.  To soothe myself.  It is my sanctuary.

One of my recent discoveries has been shocking.  In therapy, I have had to identify my trigger foods and as I have shared before...they aren't even things I necessarily like.  They are:

Wheat Thins
Triscuits
Pepperidge Farm Cookies (Butter and Milano)
Cereal
Granola Bars
Nuts
White Bread

Other things I really LOVE like pizza, Cheetos, and candy are an indulgence and I actually do not think of them in a negative light.  These items are rarely in the house and are not unhealthy things for me passing for heathy (like some of the items above), so I can clearly identify their potential damage for me if I eat them in excess.

I know I can handle a splurge from time to time if I plan for it and let myself let go and enjoy it within moderation.

One of the things I have recently learned is that everyone is so different with what triggers them.  A binge food for me may be a safe and nutritious food for someone else.  Binging is super personal and foods that make people spiral range from fruit to double bacon cheeseburgers.  The addiction is my own, so the solution has to be my own as well.

The items I listed above are foods that have always been in my parents' home.  From my earliest memories these are the foods we had to grab in the pantry.  My parents didn't believe in real junk (potato chips, soda, Hostess cakes), so when I started to binge actively in third grade, these are the snacks I stuffed myself with.  Over the last 18 months, these are the same items that have been tripping me up time and time again.

I made a major breakthrough in my eating therapy last week.  I just have to avoid these foods.  Since I do not even like these items that much, giving them up isn't that hard.  I just have to stay present and know that the snack shelf in the pantry isn't my shelf.  It belongs to my parents.  When I go back to my independent life, these items will never be in the house and now that I know how damaging they are for me, I will never buy them.

Since I rebooted my WeightWatchers, I have been eating real whole foods with little treats thrown in here and there.  Here is an example of a typical eating day for me:

Breakfast #1 (Pre-Workout):
- 2 light string cheeses
- 1 Nonfat Greek yogurt
- Iced coffee with 2 tablespoons half and half and 1 tablespoon vanilla syrup

Breakfast #2 (Post-Workout):
- 1 slice American cheese
- 3 egg whites cooked in 1 tablespoon real butter

Lunch:
- 5 ounces of breaded chicken cutlet (skinless, boneless breast) cooked in 1 tablespoon of olive oil
- Sliced tomatoes, cucumber, carrots
- Steamed corn on the cob and zucchini

Snack:
- Fruit smoothie made with fresh frozen fruit (nectarine, peach, berries, banana), 1 cup skim milk, 1 tablespoon vanilla syrup

Dinner:
- 4 ounces of grilled hanger steak
- Sliced tomatoes, cucumber, carrots
- 1 medium baked potato with 1 tablespoon real butter and 1 tablespoon real sour cream

Dessert:
- 1 vanilla ice cream dixie cup
- 1 cup cherries

Happy Tuesday!!!!